Pre-examination message from Ms Lam

Dear students,

Come tomorrow, all of you will be taking your composition examination, and for some, your oral too. Nervous? ;)

Here are some last minute reminders for all of you. Do bear them in mind as you enter the exam hall.

1) Choose your question wisely. I know that I have said this for the umpteenth time but it is really important. Do not choose a question simply because the title appeals to you/seems to be interesting. You have to be confident and comfortable doing it.

2) Read your question carefully. Your essay should work towards answering the question. From the second paragraph onwards, readers should be very clear that you are beginning to answer the question. For example, if my question is "The gift", don't spend a long time telling me about your birthday, the preparations involved, the celebrations, outings, etc, leaving the last 2 paragraphs to talk about the gift. Mention it early in your composition.

3) Avoid talking about the supernatural (an encounter with a ghost), fantasies (you met a fairy) or dreams in your composition. Try to be as realistic as possible.

4) Describe. Be as descriptive as possible. Capture your feelings, movements, looks of the characters involved, the conversations and so on.

5) Personal recounts, descriptive essays and narratives usually require you to write in the past tense.

6) Discussive essays ("What are the qualities of a good parent") and argumentative essays allow for present tense. However, always check to see if you are using your tenses correctly.

7) Do not begin a sentence with 'so' or 'and'.

8) Do not use contractions/short forms. Instead of writing "don't", write "do not".

9) Please write in paragraphs.

10) Spend 5 minutes planning your essay.

Thanks for taking time to read this naggy reminder. As you walk into the examination hall tomorrow, just keep your head cool! You can do it! All the best to all 83 of you (from 1/5, 2/3 and other coralites who are reading this)!

Regards,

Ms Sharon Lam

Pre-Examination Practice (Reports by Sec 2/3)

Sample 1: by Lulu Raidiah
You are advised to write between 150 and 200 words for this section.
You should read the information carefully and plan your answer before beginning to write.

You witnessed a violent quarrel between two neighbours in your block of flats. The incident resulted in one of them being badly hurt. You were asked by the police to write a statement to describe what happened to help them in their investigation.

You must include information on the following:
· Where and when the incident happened
· How the incident started
· The scene and damage caused at the time of the quarrel
· How badly hurt was the injured
· What help was given at that time

You should include any further information which you think would be useful.Your account should be written in clear, correct English

22 September 2006 (correct)

Lulu Radiah
Block 246
#09-275
Pasir Ris Street 21
Singapore 789246 (correct)

Sergeant Wong Lee Min
Pasir Ris Neighborhood Police Post
24 Pasir Ris Drive 4
Singapore 789005 (correct)


Report of a violent quarrel between two neighbors
On Friday, 15th September, at approximately 3p.m, I witnessed a violent quarrel between two of my neighbors at the void-deck in my block of flats. I am writing this report to give you a clearer picture of what happened then. (good intro, all the main points are covered)

I was on my way home from school when the quarrel begun. At first, I thought they were merely having a normal conversation with ample hand gesturings on their part. However, upon walking closer, it became clear from their facial expressions that they were actually having a heated quarrel.

The incident started when John, my neighbour who has retired, asked Jack, who is in his thirties, to return him his money as soon as possible. It is believed that Jack has borrowed as much as $100, 00 from John during an illegal betting. However, Jack denied to oweing John any money. John turned red with fury (good). Soon, they began exchanging harsh words/hurling abuses at each other. Outraged by Jack’s constant denial/ In a fit of anger, John removed his slippers and threw them towards Jack. The next thing John did was pick up some wooden planks from the ground and aimed them at Jack. Jack tried to dodge but proved unsuccessful.

The benches at the void-deck fell apart and some cracks were visible on both the pillars and floor. These were caused by the great impact of the wooden planks.

Jack was badly hurt at that time. The great force of the wooden planks caused Jack’s head to suffer from a bad cut. Blood was trickling down his head. His white shirt turned red as the blood flowed down his body. When John saw the blood running profusely, he ran away without helping Jack.

While one of the witnesses called for the ambulance, I used my physical education t-shirt to cover his head to prevent further blood loss. Ten minutes later, the paramedics carried him to the ambulance and sent him to the nearest hospital as fast as they could.

I hope that my statement will enable you to have a better understanding of the entire incident.



Lulu (correct)


Teacher's comments: Good Job, Lulu! Do something like this for your paper on Monday.

Sample 2: by Agnes Ong

26 July 2006 (correct)

Ong Li Jing Agnes
Blk 152
Pasir Ris st 11
#02-20
Singapore 510152 (correct)

Mr. Lim Ah Pek
Principal of Yishan Secondary School
123 Yishan Road
Singapore 123123 (correct)



Report of an incident which happened in the chemistry lab. (correct)

On Monday, 25 July 2006, at approximately two in the afternoon, my friend and I witnessed an incident which happened in the chemistry lab. I am writing this report is to give you have a clearer picture of what had happened then. (suitable introduction)

My friends and I were going to the girls toilet that day when we heard some shoutings/ ear-piercing cries which seem to be coming from the chemistry lab. Out of curiosity, we peeked inside into the chemistry lab and to see what the commotion was about. Two of my classmates, John and Alex, were having a heated argument in the chemistry lab. John shouted at Alex for pushing him while he was doing an experiment. Alex retorted that he didn’t push him had not. (don’t use short forms like didn’t).. John took offence at Alex’s words and gives gave him a shove. This causing caused Alex to stumble and knocked ( to stumble and knock. Words that follow a ‘to’ do not take a past tense) against the table and the set of apparatus which was on the table.

Alex looked shocked and, immediately rose up and shouted vulgarities at John. Before long, they were exchanging harsh words hurling abuses at each other (nothing wrong with saying “exchanging harsh words” , I changed it for you because later on in your report, you are using the term “exchanging punches”. Normally, I do not like to repeat words) and all the surrounding people, including me, were too dumbfounded to react. Following that, they started exchanging punches. My friend stepped forward to intervene but they refused to stop fighting. All of the sudden, John grabbed hold of a test-tube and threw it hard at Alex, hitting him on the forehead. Alex doubled over, and I could see blood trickling through his fingers where he was holding his forehead. ( good descriptions)

John looked dumbfounded by what he did and stood firmly rooted to the ground. A teacher walked past and fished out her mobile phone and called for an ambulance which arrival about ten minutes later. Alex was then sent to the hospital. John started crying. Mr. Lee, our science teacher, happened to be there. He learnt about the incident when he asked us about the commotion. (good descriptions)

I was told that I could leave after telling the principal what had happened in detail. I hope that my statement will enable you to have a better understanding of what took place during the incident. (good conclusion)



Agnes (correct)

Teacher’s comment’s: Certainly a great improvement, Agnes! So proud of you…However, please take note of some of your tense errors. Also note that you are to avoid using contractions/short forms such as ‘didn’t’. Instead, say ‘did not.’ Always begin with a capital letter when writing a person’s name. It’s John, not john. Otherwise, this is good effort. Do write something of this standard during tomorrow’s examination.

Mock Examination (samples to qns 5 and 6, by Ms Lam)

Qn 5: What qualities does a parent need to have in order to be a good parent?

* This is a discussive essay. Discussive essays are usually easy to handle because you need not take a stand. All you need to do is brainstorm about 3/4 points that are RELEVANT to the question and discussing them at length.

* One very important point to note is that in the body of your essay, you have to include a topic sentence, elaboration/ give suitable examples and a concluding statement. Some students make the mistake of stating just a topic sentence without any form of elaboration. This mistake is fatal. Please take note.

Parental care has always been viewed as centrally important to the physical, mental and emotional development of a child. Indeed, the raising of a child is no simple task. Since it is such a demanding task, it is essential that parents possess certain qualities before they can provide an optimum environment for the child to grow up in.

--> In the intro, DO NOT start talking about the qualities that a good parent must posess. Give a brief summary of the role of parents , how important and demanding they are. In the last sentence, you can rephrase the question to show the examiner that you are about to answer the question. E.g. "Since it is such a demanding task, it is essential that parents possess certain qualities before they can provide an optimum environment for the child to grow up in." /" There are several qualities that a parent need to possess, which will be discussed in this essay."

One of the most salient qualities that a parent must possess in order to be a good parent is the ability to provide a child with unconditional love. ( --> give a clear topic sentence) Mothers and fathers should be entirely accepting of their children, regardless of whatever shortcomings and faults the child may have. This is because, it is an enviornment filled with love that a child will feel safe to make mistakes in (--> some elaboration going on). Indeed, love is a necessary ingredient/quality in fostering (= creating) a strong bond between children and their parents. (--> concluding statement)

Another crucial (=important) quality that a good parent must have is the ability to respect their children. (--> have a clear topic sentence again. State clearly the second quality) Although parents are older than their children and children have to respect the authority of their parents, it is just as important for parents to respect their children. For instance, parents should realise that all children too are deserving of their own privacy and they should not attempt to secretly read their child's diary or blog entries. Parents should also be sensitive to their child's feelings and not shame/humiliate the child in the public by scolding or beating him or her. (--> elaborate on what it means to respect a child). In other words, a good parent is one who respects their children as much as they expect their chiildren to respect them. (--> a clear concluding sentence that reinforces the idea conveyed in this paragraph)

However, while love is a necessary quality for good parenting, parents also need to have the wisdom and maturity to determine what is best for their child.(--> clear topic sentence) Loving a child does not mean giving him or her everything he or she wants for this will only encourage an unhealthy over-indulgence in the child’s wants on the parent's part. There are some cases of parents who grant their children all their wishes. As a result, their children grow up to become spoilt brats. As the common saying goes, "Spare the rod and spoil the child". Loving a child also does not mean not correcting the child and punishing him or her when they have done something wrong. (--> elaborate on what it means to love a child but not to the extent of adoration (= treating him like an idol and not correcting him or her when he/she makes a mistake) A good parent should seek to inculcate good moral values in his or her children so that they will be able to distinguish between right from wrong and grow up to become law-abiding citizens. (--> concluding statement)

In conclusion, the role that parents play in the growing up years of a child is unquestionable. Good parenting ensures that the well-being of a child is well taken care of. Thus, a good parent should be one who is able to love his or her child with no strings attached, be sensitive and respectful towards the needs of a child. At the same time, a good parent is also responsible for ensuring that the child does not grow up becoming a self-centred/self-conceited individual. Thus, there is still a need for a loving parent to correct his or her child when a wrong is done.

--> like the introduction, mention the role that parents play. Next, summarise the qualities of a good parent.

Qn: Parents should be punished when the children commit crimes. Discuss.

* This is an argumentative essay. In the LAST SENTENCE of your introduction, you have to state your stand clearly on whether or not you think parents should or should not be punished. However, please note that for argumentative essays, you ARE NOT ALLOWED to begin your essay with a "Yes, I agree" or "No, I disagree."

* In an argumentative essay, your job is to PERSUADE readers to take your stand.

* However, you should still talk about arguments from both sides. Reasons why they should be punished and reasons on why they should not be punished.

Today, in many parts of the world, the crimes committed by juveniles (= teenagers) have increased. This is a cause for alarm (= valid reason for us to worry) and there are many factors for this trend. There have been debates on whether the parents of children should be held responsible for the crimes committed by their children. (--> you can talk about the two differering views on this issue first before telling readers about your belief in the very last sentence of your introduction). There has also been an increasing number of cases where parents had been reprimanded by judges for not taking their children in hand. However, I am of the view that children rather than parents deserve the punishment. (--> notice how in this last sentence of the intro, I am actually stating my stand on this issue)

One of the most salient reasons why parents should be the one punished is that the role of the parents is to impart moral values to their children. (-> toipc sentence) More often than not, parents tend to place a lot of emphasis on the academic achievements of their children, neglecting the moral behaviour of their children. Due to ignorance, their children may commit crimes. (--> elaboration) If this is the case, then parents should be punished as they have failed to teach their children the rights and wrongs in society. (--> concluding statement)

Another reason why parents should be pumished is because they are responsible for the upbringing of their children. (--> topic sentence) Some parents do not believe in the saying “Spare the rod and spoil the child.” As a result, their children are unaware of their wrongdoings. Parents, in their effort to protect their children, will shield (= protect) them even if they have committed wrongdoings. These children will feel that they have not done anything wrong since their parents condone (--> seem to approve of) their actions. When they grow up, they may commit the crimes again but instead of having their parents to protect them, they will face the harsh punishment of society. (--> a lot of elaboration going on on how parents may be responsible when their children go astray. Thus, they are to be punished). Therefore, parents should be punished for this mistaken ‘love’ which has caused their children to go astray instead of learning from past mistakes. (concluding statement)

Although parents play a crucial (= important) role in the upbringing of their children,the role of peers in juvenile crimes should not be overlooked as well. (--> after talking about reasons for punishing parents, you have to talk about reasons that are AGAINST punishing them). Peer pressure can cause many children to join gangs, smoke, shoplift in order to be accepted by their parents. In this case, parents are too powerless to stop their children from committing crimes and should not be punished.(--> elaborate on why parents do not deserve to be punished). It would thus be very unfair to punish them. (--> concluding statement)

Furthermore, by punishing the parents, the children would only be more irresponsible. (--> topic sentence) They may think that they will never get into trouble as their parents will be the ones punished and become more bold in their actions. This will only lead to a further moral degradation of society. The children will also never learn from their mistakes as they do not face any consequences.(--> elaboration) With parents being punished, this will only further increase the crimes committed by children. (--> concluding sentence)

In conclusion, I am inclined to thinking that parents should not be punished for their childrens’ crimes in most cases. (--> in your conclusion, state your stand very clealry once again)Most of the time, children are influenced by external circumstances like their peers. Parents always want the best for their children although some may not express it in the right way. When children disregard their parents’ teachings and commit crimes, they themselves should be responsible and punished or they will never learn their mistakes. Other times, instead of punishing parents, they should be made to go for counselling with their children. (--> you may offer solutions to a problem in your conclusion)

English Mock Exam (Samples with notes)

Qn 1: Write about an occasion when a stranger asked you for help.
* This is an example of a PERSONAL RECOUNT.

* Be sure to state clearly what was the favour asked of you right from the beginning. Always read your question carefully.

* Describe how the stranger looks.

* Describe your thoughts and reactions when the story asked you for help. You can use direct speech.

*AFTER STATING WHAT WAS EXPECTED OF YOU, MAKE SURE THAT YOUR STORY REVOLVES AROUND HOW YOU GO ABOUT HELPING THE STRANGER. ( Body of essay)

* Explain how the story came to a close but ONLY after showing readers HOW you helped the stranger. How did you feel?

* Use the PAST TENSE.

“One, two three, four……” I counted to myself idly, watching the cars whizzing along the road. I was waiting at the bus stop after soccer practice. The school was unusually quiet, a stark contrast from the hustle and bustle of students and teachers going about their daily activities in the morning. To my immense annoyance, the bus was taking much longer than usual to arrive. Tired and thirsty after the practice, I could feel my shirt sticking uncomfortably to my back.

--> note the descriptions that have been used to convey how busy the roads are, how quiet the school is and how tired I am feeling.

I glanced at my watch for the umpteenth time, wondering what was taking the bus so long to arrive.

“Excuse me, could I have a few minutes of your time?”

I lifted my eyes as I felt a tap on my shoulder, turning around to see a distinguished looking middle-aged woman smiling at me hesitantly. She was dressed smartly in a pantsuit and high heels, with immaculately (= perfectly) styled hair and make-up. “My car has broken down and I need some help to get it started again. I’m on my way to an important conference and there isn’t enough time for me to call a mechanic or a taxi so I would really appreciate it if you could lend me a hand,” she explained, giving me an exasperated (= nearly desperate) smile.

--> note how the importance of describing the stranger so that the readers will be able to picture how he/she actually looks like. The use of direct speech/conversation is very helpful too. It makes the story come alive.

“Er……sure. I’ll try to do whatever I can,” I replied, getting up from my seat. Inwardly, I groaned at the thought of having to push the heavy car with my arms and legs sore from physical training. Nevertheless, I rose from my seat and followed her across the road to her car.

--> describes my thoughts.

The red Mercedes benz gleamed brightly in the afternoon sun. The woman unlocked her car hurriedly and I stepped forward into position, with my hands planted firmly on the car boot.

--> describe how her car looks like. "hurriedly" may be a simple word but it shows the manner in which she is moving. For your composition exam, think about HOW something is done, said , etc.

“Okay, start pushing,” she yelled from the driver’s seat. I started pushing with all my might. I could feel my muscles stretching and straining as beads of perspiration trickled down my forehead. However, the car refused to budge.

--> Instead of saying "said" all the time, you can replace it with other words like "yelled" or "screamed". Describe how I pushed the car, and describe how tired I was doing so.

“Push harder, boy!”

I rolled my eyes in frustration, seeing the woman wave her manicured hand out of the car window. After several minutes of heaving and pushing, the car finally started a slow crawl forward. My efforts finally paid off as the car gradually accelerated, going faster and faster until it was speeding along the road past the traffic lights.

--> again I tried to show readers how irritated I was to be subjected to the orders of the lady. I described how I looked (= "rolled my eyes in frustration"). I also tried to capture the lady's moverments and how the car gradually started moving.

“You’re welcome,” I muttered, pausing to catch my breath. Feeling disgruntled (= dissatisfied) that she had not even bothered to thank me for helping her, I made my way back to the bus stop. Just then, my bus arrived and I boarded it quickly, eager to enjoy the cool air conditioning. As the bus sped along, I kept a lookout for red Mercedes benzs on the road. “Maybe she’ll write a letter of commendation to the principal to praise me for my helpfulness,” I mused to myself, a slow grin spreading along the corners of my mouth.

--> Instead of saying "said", "muttered" was used to show how softly I spoke. This story also a little twist of sorts. Instead of thanking me for my help, the lady in the story simply drove off. I tried to show how discontented I was as well as how I tried to think happy thoughts--" Maybe she'll write a letter of commendation to the principal to praise me for my helpfulness."


Qn 2: Write a story ending with the following words: “……we could only be glad we were cleared of all guilt.”

*A narrative essay.

* Once again, EARLY in your composition, write about an event which makes you appear like a gulty party/makes you seem like you have done something wrong.

* The question says that you were cleared from all guilt. Therefore, you will be out of point if you talk about a story whereby you were indeed guilty. Remember, you were mistaken. You had not done soemthing wrong.

* Describe. Describe how you felt, what were your thoughts, actions, as well as other characters in the story. You may use direct speech/conversations. Of course, don't use them excessively.

I could not believe my eyes. I turned towards my friends and saw them wearing identical expressions of astonishment. The papers on the table remained stubbornly on the table, and we could not tear their eyes off them.

“Do you think those are what I think they are?” Mandy asked, her eyes turning as wide as saucers. “I think so…… they’re the end-of-year science examination papers aren’t they? Look! It’s printed on the cover page,” Sam replied in awe. We were supposed to meet our science teacher, Mr Lim, in the classroom after school for remedial lessons as we had failed their common test recently. However, after lunch, we arrived at the classroom to find it empty and a stack of papers on the teacher’s table.

“What should we do now?” I asked. “I don’t suppose it’s all right if we take just a little peek at the exam questions?” said Mandy, with a hopeful glint in her eyes. “My parents have threatened to ban me from using the computer if I fail my science exam. If we keep this matter to ourselves, no one would ever know that we saw the exam paper before the exam and we’ll be able to do well.”

“No! How could you even suggest that! It would be as good as cheating! We should be responsible for our own grades. Moreover, if we did it, we might get Mr Lim into trouble as well,” Sam refused Mandy’s suggestion vehemently ( = strongly. Normally, we can say that somebody "protests vehemently".) . I nodded in agreement. “We should wait for Mr Lim to come and tell him about this,” Sam added.

Just then, the sound of footsteps echoed along the corridor and the discipline master, Mr Koh, strode past the doorway and entered the classroom. “Why are you still in school? Shouldn’t you be at home studying for your exams?” he favoured us with a stern glance, folding his arms across his chest in his customary no-nonsense manner.

“We’re supposed to be having a remedial lesson with Mr Lim but he hasn’t arrived yet,” Sam answered hurriedly, a slight flush staining his cheeks as he squirmed under the discipline master’s unwavering gaze. Mr Koh studied us intently for a moment before letting his gaze rest on the stack of papers on the table. His eyes narrowed and he strode forward purposefully, sweeping up the papers in one swift fluid motion.

“What’s this?” Mr Koh’s voice had turned dangerously low and Mandy, Sam and I could not resist trading each other a terrified glance. “How did you get hold of these papers before your exam?”

The students felt their blood turn into ice as they realized what the presence of the papers implied. Mandy stammered, “We… we have no idea how they got here. They were already on the table when we entered the classroom.” Sam and I nodded anxiously in agreement.

“Sorry I’m late. I forgot to bring some notes for you so I had to return to the staffroom to get them,” Mr Lim appeared in the doorway. “Hi, Mr Koh. Is something the matter here?” Mr Lim enquired (= asked).

“Mr Lim, we swear we didn’t take steal the exam papers! They were already on the table when we entered the classroom,” Mandy pleaded. “What exam papers?” Mr Lim looked around the room with a puzzled frown. Finally, he caught sight of the papers in Mr Koh’s hands and a glimmer of understanding appeared in his eyes.

“Oh, those are last year’s examination papers that I printed for you to practice. Look here, it says ‘2005 Semester 2 Science Examination’,” Mr Lim clarified. Mr Koh’s wintry expression swiftly changed into one of embarrassment and chagrin (= disappointment). He apologized for not reading the papers carefully, resulting in him mistaking us for stealing the exam papers. Heaving a sigh of relief, we could only be glad we were cleared of all guilt.

Qn 3: Describe an occasion when you did voluntary work.

* A descritpive essay.

* State clearly what you did there. Try to talk about three activtities you did and elaborate on them.

* Be descriptive. Talk about how you feel and what your thoughts were before and after the voluntary work.

* Voluntary work ususally involves work done on your own free will. If you are talking about events such as folding paper cranes or the big walk, tell me who will benefit from your work.

* Descriptive essays are usually hard to handle. Do not touch them if you are not confident.

Prior to last year (= Before last year), I had never engaged in voluntary work. Although I knew it was a meaningful activity, and teachers in school had always encouraged us to help others in need, I had never felt compelled (= the urge) to offer my free time and energy to help others as a volunteer worker. However, last year’s community involvement program (CIP) provided me with the opportunity to fully appreciate the importance of voluntary work.

My co-curricular activity’s (CCA) teacher-in-charge, Miss Lee, had arranged for the choir to go to Green Ridge Old Folks’ Home to provide voluntary help. We were required to come up with a performance to entertain the elderly residents in the old folks’ home and also to assist with renovation works. As one of the sectional leaders, I had to stay back in school with the committee members to decide on the repertoire of songs we were going to perform. We finally decided on a range of traditional folk songs which we had learnt recently.

On the day of the excursion, we boarded the school bus and left for the old folks’ home straight after school. When we arrived at our destination, we were immediately led to the sitting room by the matron, where we started to get ready for our performance. As I got into my usual position in the second row, I realized that the sitting room was already crowded with people. More than thirty elderly men and women were seated in front of us, all wrapped in pink and blue dressing gowns. They were smiling at us and looked eager for us to begin. The student conductor started us on our first piece, and when the song ended, they burst into enthusiastic applause. I had never performed to such an appreciative audience before. Since I was only in secondary two, my choir performances were largely limited to school events or competitions. During school events like the Lunar New Year performance, the audience’s response had always been lukewarm at best. In the old folks’ home however, despite the applause not being extremely loud, I could see many happy and contented faces and the elderly audience looked like they really enjoyed our singing.

After our performance ended, the matron brought us to the visiting room which we were supposed to help to repaint. The room had been painted in a musty pale green colour, and paint was peeling off in several places on the ceiling. We were handed brushes and cans of bright yellow paint and we proceeded to give the room a makeover. When we were done with our work, the room looked brand new. As I inspected (= studied) our handiwork, I felt sure that the lovely yellow shade would liven up the atmosphere in the old folks’ home and help to lift the residents’ spirits.

Before we left, we were offered some refreshments in the dining area. I was taking a drink from the table when an old lady beckoned (= singalled) me over with a wave of her hand. She started speaking to me in Hokkien and kept smiling and patting my arm companionably (= in a friendly way). Although I could not understand most of what she had been saying, I could make out a few words which most probably referred to our performance. I gathered that she was praising us for our singing and I felt happy yet a little embarrassed at the same time.

When it was time to leave, the old lady waved cheerily to me and said to me in halting English (= bits of English, imperfect), “Bye…bye. See you again.” The rest of the old folk also waved at us warmly. While we queued up to get on the bus, the matron thanked us for our help and explained that the old folks were really glad for our company. Many of them were childless and often had no visitors. As a result, they often felt lonely and sad. Our visit and performance had brightened up their day considerably.

Having had the experience of engaging in voluntary work, I have begun to understand why volunteers enjoy their work so much. The joy of helping others makes voluntary work fulfilling. I was glad that I was able to make a difference in someone else’s life.

Qn 4: The Gift

* This is a narrative essay. You can interpret it as a present or a talent. Both are fine. What is important though is that you start talking about it from the beginning/or second paragraph onwards. Quite a number of students made the mistake of talking about you having a birthday party, then the celebrations, an outing, leaving the last paragraph to talk about the gift. Please take note that you must ensure that your story revolves around the gift.

* What is the gift you have decided to talk about? How is special and different from other gifts? Describe it.

* Construct an interesting story that resulted from you having/receiving this gift.

Jane stirred her porridge listlessly (= lethargically) as she watched her friends, Alison and Kate, attacked their fried chicken with relish (=with great pleasure and delight). “How’s your practice coming along, Jane? Have you succeeded in hitting that high note?” asked Alison through a mouth full of chicken. “No, I’m still having problems with it. My instructor thinks I’ve been indulging myself in junk food again so my voice has been affected as a result. But I swear I haven’t. Maybe I’ve got a mental block or something,” Jane sighed, lifting her spoon and letting clumps of porridge slide back into the bowl with soft plops.

“But it would be so cool to miss school again right? You’ll be traveling to Italy for that competition. We’ll be stuck here studying for the exams,” All but ignoring what Jane had just said, Kate sniffed at her coleslaw disdainfully and started on her French fries. There was nothing much that Jane could do except to smile and carry on with her porridge.

Nobody really understood. Everybody thought she was the subject of envy and praise, as her gift for singing earned her numerous awards and thrust her under the spotlight constantly. She had been labeled as a singing prodigy (= genius) since age five, when her talent at singing had been unwittingly (= accidentally) discovered by her aunt when she had been able to perform a pitch perfect “Silent Night” during a Christmas gathering at her grandparents’ house. Since then, life had become an endless cycle of practices, performances and competitions. To ensure that her gift was utilized (= used) to its fullest, her parents kept her on a strict diet and planned her daily activities to ensure that she had a full eight hours of sleep everyday in addition to five hours of training. She also had to attend private tuition sessions to make up for the lessons she missed in school. Consequently, she had hardly any free time left to herself.

Lately, she had been having problems with one of her competition pieces. Try as she might (=no matter how hard she tried), she just could not reach one of the high notes in the chorus. Previously, she had always been able to hit the notes with ease but somehow, recently, she felt herself getting stuck whenever she attempted to do so. Her parents and her instructor knew her weaknesses for fried food and ice cream and had accused her of eating those foods when she was not supposed to. However, she had not eaten any of those for more than two months since training for the competition in Italy began.

Sometimes, she wondered if her gift was really a curse instead. Sitting beside her friends, watching them complain about having to stay at home in Singapore while enjoying her favourite food, Jane had a sudden urge to pour her porridge down the trashcan and sink her teeth into (= take a bite) one of the chicken wings on the table.

To hell with singing, she thought. “What do you say to me skipping singing practice today and watching a movie with you guys?” Jane asked hopefully.

“What? You must be joking, right? Your competition’s in two weeks, you know. Besides, Kate and I are going to the library after lunch to do research for our project,” Alison laughed, shaking her head in disbelief.

Hearing her words, Jane abruptly (= suddenly) stood up and picked up her bag from the floor. “I’ve got to be going, practice is in fifteen minutes. See you guys around.” She did not bother waiting for their reply as she turned on her heel and left. Making her way to the school gate, she tried her best to keep herself looking calm and composed. It was time for her singing lessons again and she resigned herself to another round of lectures from her instructor on self-discipline.

: .

Writing a letter of complaint (byMs Lam--> for both my sec ones and twos)

You had dinner with your family at a restaurant recently. It was an expensive restaurant that had been highly recommended by a food review magazine. However, it turned out to be a terrible experience. The behaviour of the restaurant stuff and the food were not up to expectations. Eventually, you and your family left the restaurant without finishing your food.

Write a letter of complaint to the manager of the restaurant describing in detail the incident that had taken place. You must include what happened to you and each of your family members during the visit to the restaurant.

You should provide suggestions on how the restaurant can improve on their service and how you feel you should be compensated for your bad experience there.

Alexander Tan
Block 111
Pasir Ris street 11
#04-88
Singapore 510111

20th September 2006

Mr Wong Hock Meng
Manager
Palace Restaurant
31 Orchard Road
Singapore 676089

Dear Mr Wong,

Complaint about food and behaviour of restaurant staff

On 10th September 2006, my family and I had dinner at Palace Restaurant to celebrate my grandmother’s eightieth birthday. We had decided to patronize this restaurant after reading rave reports about it by a food review magazine. However, it turned out to be a terrible experience for all of us. In the rest of my letter, I will outline in detail what had happened on that day.

That evening, my family arrived promptly at the restaurant at seven. Although we had called the restaurant two days ago to reserve a table for six, the receptionist had forgotten to make the necessary arrangements for us. As a result, we had to join the queue and waited for nearly twenty minutes before we were shown to our seats.

At the restaurant, my parents browsed through the menu but could not make up their minds on what to order. The waitress who was waiting to take down the orders looked visibly irritated. When my parents asked her for recommendations, she was clearly unwilling to do so, adding that she could not do so as she did not know about the preferences of my family.

When our food was finally served, we were all looking forward to tucking into piping hot food. However, upon sinking our teeth into the chili crab, we realized to our disappointment that it was only lukewarm. Also, the steamed fish that was served to us was somewhat stale. At this juncture, my grandmother waved to a waiter who happened to be standing close by and told him about the poor quality of food. Instead of being apologetic, we were shocked when the waiter told my grandmother off, saying that he was only a waiter, not a chef. Vexed by the chain of events we had experienced there, my family decided to leave the restaurant.

Indeed, I am of the view that it is timely that the waiters and waitresses of the restaurant be given proper training on how to serve their customers appropriately. There is also a need to conduct checks on the quality of food that is being served to the customers. On my part, I would appreciate it if my family be granted a refund for the bills that we have footed.

Thank you for looking into this matter and for your prompt action to rectify this problem.

Yours sincerely,
Alexander

Informal letter writing (by Ms Lam)

You have just heard that a relative of yours is in hospital for a minor operation. You have decided to write a letter intended to express your concern. You should:

Say how sorry you are
Ask about the patient’s well-being
Give some light-hearted news from home
Suggest a home-coming party
Promise a visit

Using all five points above, write a letter to your relative. You may add details of your own if you wish. Make sure that your English is correct and that the letter is cheerful.

Anne Ho
Block 6 Tanan Suria
#02-1234
Singapore 118205

25th August 2005

Dearest Uncle Thomas,

I returned from my holiday trip to Canada two days ago and am very sorry to learn that you have been admitted to the hospital for a minor knee operation. How are you feeling after the operation? I hope that your knee does not hurt so much anymore.

On a different note, I have a couple of light-hearted news from home that I cannot wait to share with you. First of all, do you know that our beloved little John has started crawling? When I came home that day, little John was so excited to see me carrying a bagful of presents, he stopped playing with his toys and hurried towards me. That was when all of us saw him taking his first step. His steps are not very steady yet but the whole family is simply thrilled by the prospect of John being able to finally walk on his own two feet! As I write, I can almost see a smile spreading across your face.

My brother has also passed his swimming examination. He is feeling very proud of himself and has been bragging to us about it. But really, it is quite a feat for him for someone who used to have a phobia for water. I still remember him wailing at the top of his voice when my father tried to make him dip himself in a 1.2 metre swimming pool! It is certainly your ceaseless encouragements that Bob was able to pluck up courage to attend swimming classes and eventually pass it. Mum and Dad used to complain that Bob listens to you alone. Dad wanted to have a swim with Bob the other day but Bob insisted that you must be the first person he swims with.

An old friend of Grandma is keen to venture into a mini pastry business and is persuading Grandma to join her as a business partner. If all goes well, Grandma would be selling pastries at the nearby Ang Mo Kio market soon.

There is simply so much more that the family and I want to tell you when you are discharged. Before I forget, the family wants me to let you know that there will be a home-coming party for you when you discharge next week. There will be lots of food and a karaoke session. We all know that staying in the hospital for two weeks must be a boring experience for you. Aunt May also believes the party will ward off all bad luck. For the rest of us, we cannot wait to welcome you home. Everyone misses you dearly.

That is all for now. Do take great care of yourself and have a good rest. I will drop by to pay you a visit pretty soon.

With Much Love,
Jass

Report Writing

You witnessed an argument between two of your schoolmates while you were on your way home. Their argument became more heated and a fight soon broke out. This resulted in one of them being severely injured. You were asked by the discipline master to write a report to describe what had happened.

You must include information on the following:
· Where and when the incident happened
· Describe in detail how the incident started
· Describe how you and the others reacted
· How badly hurt was the injured
· How the incident ended

You should include any further information which you think would be useful.
Your account should be written in clear, correct English.

19 September 2006

Mandy Tan
Block 246
#09-275
Pasir Ris Street 21
Singapore 789246

Mr Wong Lee Min
Discipline Master
Coral Secondary School
24 Pasir Ris Drive 4
Singapore 789005



Report of a fight which broke out between two of my classmates

On Friday, 15th September, at approximately 3 p.m., I witnessed a fight between two of my classmates at the food court at Whitesands Shopping Centre. I am writing this report to give you a clearer picture of what happened that day.

I had lunch at a foodcourt in Whitesands Shopping Centre that day and was about to leave for home when I heard some shouting from the drinks stall. Out of curiosity, I picked up my belongings and went forward to see what the commotion was about. Two of my classmates, Lim Jun Wee and Marcus, were having an argument in front of the drinks stall. Jun Wee shouted at Marcus for jumping the queue and Marcus retorted that it was none of his business. Jun Wee took offence at Marcus’ words and gave him a shove, causing Marcus to stumble backwards and knocked into another boy standing nearby.

Marcus looked shocked at first but almost immediately rose up and pushed Jun Wee to the floor. They started exchanging punches and all the surrounding people, including me, were too dumbfounded to react. A man stepped forward to intervene but they refused to stop fighting. All of a sudden, Jun Wee grabbed hold of a can of soft drink and threw it hard at Marcus, hitting him on the forehead. Marcus doubled over, and I could see blood trickling through his fingers where he was holding his forehead.

Jun Wee looked stunned by what he did and stood firmly rooted to the ground. A lady fished out her mobile phone and called for an ambulance which arrived about ten minutes later. Marcus was then sent to the hospital. Jun Wee started to cry and I went forward to help him. Miss Goh, our Science teacher, happened to be in the shopping centre at that time and learnt about the incident when she asked some passers-by about the commotion.

She immediately came to us and escorted us back to school. I was told that I could leave after telling the principal what had happened in detail. Jun Wee had to wait in school for his parents to arrive. As for Marcus, he suffered from a mild concussion and had to have seven stitches on his forehead. Jun Wee also had some minor scratches on his forearms.

I hope that my statement will enable you to have a better understanding of what took place during the incident.



Mandy

Writing an information report/brochure (by Ms Lam)--> for my sec 1s

Chinatown, Singapore

Chinatown is indeed a must-see during your visit to Singapore. Also known as “Niu Che Shui”, which literally translates into “Bullock Cart Water”, it used to be home to the majority of Chinese immigrants who came here to work as far back as 1819. Today, Chinatown is one of the few places which still retains the rich cultural heritage of the ancient past.

Sites to visit within Chinatown

Chinatown Heritage Centre
For those who are keen to have a deeper understanding of Singapore’s historical past, Chinatown’s Heritage Centre is the place to go. Much effort has gone into ensuring that tourists will get a real insight into the lives of those who settled in Singapore. This includes the series of galleries which describe the history of the area as well as true stories of immigrants who came here to work as samsui women, rickshaw pullers or coolies. On top of that, the Centre has carefully reconstructed cramped and dark rooms, corridors, stairs and kitchens within the building so as to provide tourists with a first-hand experience of the living conditions back then.

Fuk Tak Chi Museum

Another place where one can visit to learn about the diverse history of Singapore is the Fuk Tak Chi Museum. Here, you will have an opportunity to see a wide array of exhibits which traces the lives of immigrants. Close by, around Far East Square and Pekin Street, visitors will be able view the shophouses where these immigrants used to live. Visitors will be able to relive the charm of yesteryear.

Sri Mariamman Temple
Strangely enough, the Sri Mariamman temple is one of the most attractive sites in Chinatown. In fact, this temple is one of the top tourist attractions each year, drawing as many as thousands of visitors annually. This temple was originally built in 1827 and was dedicated to the goddess Mariamman who was believed to possess the power to treat diseases such as smallpox and cholera. Although it looks very different today compared to the time it was first built, the unique architecture of the temple is no doubt worth a look.

Food
When you need to recharge, simply stop at any of the roadside stalls or restaurants. Be assured that you will be able to sample some of the most authentic local delicacies here such as the famous laska, hokkien mee, dumplings and so on.

Shopping
If you want to shop, be sure to start from the areas around Pagoda and Temple Streets. Here, you will be able to find several shops which sell Chinese antiques, souvenirs and other rare collectibles.

Opening Hours
Daily (9am - 8pm, including Public Holidays)
How to get there
By MRT: Nearest MRT Station is Chinatown. Walk down Pagoda St. to the Chinatown Heritage Centre.

Be sure to visit Chinatown during your stay in Singapore! This is one of the only places where the rich traditional culture still lives in the form of historical buildings, food, trishaw rides and souvenirs sold.

Sources
http://www.realdestination.com/singapore/attractions/chinatown.php

http://www.atravellersreststop.com.sg/photogallery/Chinatown.htm

http://www.merlioncity.com/cabtan/chinatown.html

http://www.visitsingapore.com/publish/stbportal/en/home/what_to_see/ethnic_quarters/chinatown.html

http://www.chinatownheritage.com.sg/

http://livelife.ecitizen.gov.sg/culture/heritage/chinatownctr.asp

Situational writing test (Sec 1/5)

By: Aloysius Poh

Aloysius
Blk 566
Pasir Ris st 51
#10-114
Singapore 510566

29 August 2006

Dear Kenneth,
How are you? I hope you are fine. I have just received your letter asking on how our school fun fair was. Well, I shall tell you every single thing there was and about what I did without missing out on a single bit of detail!

The fun fair was held to raise funds for charity. Our school joined other some schools in holding this event. Since it is nearing the end of the year, the principal is confident that many people would be interested in coming. Some upper secondary students would be setting up stalls too.

Now, I shall tell you what I did at the fair. Remember when you were still in Singapore, we all used to hang out with John and Joel almost everyday? Well, John, Joel and I toured around the entire fair. It was held in our school field, so it was a relatively big first stop.

We went to the candy stall and sank our teeth to the cotton candy and drank a couple of drinks. Next, we saw a gaily lighted up tent and went to look at it as it as so eye-catching. At the front of the tent, there was a poster. It read “Practice your archery skills to shoot down targets! The closer to the Bullseye, the bigger your prize. Only two dollars for three shots.” Excited, we went to try our luck. I was not very good at archery though. The first shot went to the side of the entire board, the second shot hit the far sight of the target, the last shot hit above the bullsye. Joel fired next. He was better. All three shots went directly to the Bullseye and stayed there, quivering. I walked out of the tent with a stuff dog and bear. Joel walked out with a gameset, a pair of binoculars and a bigger bear while John walked out with a monopoly gameset which was still in good condition, a shopping voucher and a brand new Nike limited edition water bottle.

After that, we finished our candy floss, and went to the next tent called “Haunted house. Enter if you dare…” We smirked, paid the small two dollars fee, and entered. As the doors closed behind us, a glowing skeleton dropped directly in front of me, hanging from a chain. I paled and sidestepped it. As we walked on, a box beside us sprung up from the lid and out jumped a half-skeletoned jack in the box! It leered at us and evil laughter from hidden speakles were heard. We had had enough. We dashed to the other side of the tent, while more and more traps sprung out. There, rag-dolls, holograms and even a coffin in which something jumped up and shook a fist at us! We dashed out to the bright and lovely sunshine, feeling utterly relieved.

We actually did many things but there were simply too many to relate. I think some of the most interesting stalls were these: “Haunted house”, “ House of ancient artifacts” (we visited that next) and “Paint ball house!” ( All entrance fees were two dollars) The paint ball house was held at the parade square.

At the end of it all, the main highlight as a magnificent performance by the Singapore Chinese Orchestra, Singapore lion and dragon dance association, and even a play performed by all our teachers. It was really hilarious.

I totally liked every single activity at the fair even though the “house of amazing bird” was a little boring. But there was something I really disliked about it. WE SPENT OVER 20 DOLLARS ADDED ALTOGETHER! It was lucky that the money was our “Ang Pow” money.

Well, that should be it. That was almost all we did at the fair. I look forward to seeing you soon!

Best Regards,
Aloysius Poh

Teacher’s comments: Well Done, Aloysius! I too am very entertained reading your letter. It was truly engaging. However, you can work on writing more concise sentences--some rambling in your letter, particularly paragraph 4.

By: Chin Zhi Ru

Chin Zhi Ru
Blk 475 Pasir Ris Drive 6
#03-554
S (510485)

29 August 2006

Dear Kenneth,
How are you? I am fine. Well, as you know, while you were away, the school fun fair was held. It is such a pity that you did not attend the funfair. The funfair was to raise funds for the orphanage so as to give the orphans an opportunity to attend school as well as buy toys and necessities for them.

There were some interesting games stalls at the fair. For example, the ‘Pick-an-apple’ game requires participants to tie up his hand. He must then try to use his or her mouth to grab an apple in the water. It was really a challenging game as the person has to pick as many apples as he or she could within three minutes. There were many people lining up for this game. There was a boy who managed to pick five apples within the time limit.

I was helping out at the snack bar. There were many people lining up as they were either hungry or thirsty after the fun they had at the games stalls. There was utter confusion as there were only Shermaine and I tending to the stall.

The highlight of the fair was the magic show which was held in the tent. The magician did many wonderful tricks and pulled many things out of his black bowler hat as though the hat can keep as many things as a bag could! It was really the best magic show I had ever seen!

There were some things that I liked and disliked about the fair. The things I like were the magic show and watching the little ones playing on the inflatable castle bursting with energy. What I disliked about the fair was the rubbish which was strewn al over the place when the fair ended. All of us had to spend about an hour to finish clearing the litter.

I have to go now. Bye!

Love,
Zhi Ru

Teacher's comments: Very good piece of work, Zhi Ru! Now, work on your conclusion.

By: Wee Chia Yin

Wee Chia Yin
Blk70
Bedok South Road
#06-278
Singapore 400070

29th August 2006

Dear Kenneth,

How have you been? It has been quite a while since we last met and I hope that you are enjoying yourself back at Malaysia. However, you still do remember the funfair back here don’t you? Well, the funfair was just a holiday activity organized by the school to let us relax after all the exams and reward us for all our hard work. Other than that, I thought that it was a great chance for teachers, friends and students to meet and catch up on what was going on during the holidays.

There were also stalls et up by some of our classmates and the food that they were selling was simply fabulous. Here are some of the various food they were selling: lollipops, cotton candy, sweets, popcorn, crackers, soft drinks, chocolates and many more. If you prefer some hot food, you can try out some of the fried noodles, steamed fish, chicken, vegetables, roti prata, wedges, French fries, all specially homemade for this event. My mouth just waters thinking about it.

Enough of the food talking. There were also professional dancers dancing on the big stage, set up in the middle of the field, in front of all the stalls. The dancers were really great. They danced a variety of dances, from Chinese to Malay and Japanese dances. I guess this was the highlight of the event. I guess this was the main highlight of the event. It was amazing to see them dance continuously. You can even have a special request to choose a dance and they will perform it for you.

Do you want to know what I did at the fair? Well, I did not do anything in particular but walked around shopping for food and watching the dancers performing their wonderful dances. I also went to catch up with friends and teachers that I have known over the years studying there. Come to think of it, I will be really sad when I leave the school after the ‘PSLE’. After all, this is where I spend most of my time in other than my home.

Now, back to reality. Of course, how could I have forgotten to mention the movies in the auditorium? There were movies being screened at the auditorium and we got to bring any movies we would like to share with our fellow classmates. This was my favourite part of the event. I was at the auditorium most of my time other than buying of food. However, I really hated the fact that the funfair was held in the wet and muddy field. My shoes were so dirty after the fair, I had to wash them myself.

After all that I have said, does this tempt you to fast forward the time to next year’s funfair? I am sure it does. I really hope that you will be able to join me during the funfair for it will surely be better than this year’s. I do not want to tire you out reading all of this. I shall stop here. Take care and I hope to receive your reply soon.

Best Wishes,
Chia Yin

Teacher’s comments: Wonderfully written! It’s almost flawless. I must say that I too am tempted to join in the funfair after reading your letter!

Report Writing (Sec 2/3)

While you were playing a game at school, a friend of yours was badly hurt.
The principal has asked you to write a report describing what happened. You may include any other information which you think would be helpful.

when and where it happened
who was hurt and how
damage to clothing, property, equipment
what you and others felt and did
who, if anyone, was to blame

You should include any other information which you think would be helpful.

Sample 1: Joey Ngien (22/30)

Joey Ngien
Blk 420
Pasir Ris Drive 6
#02-67
Singapore 510420

Mdm Veronica Ng
Principal of Coral Secondary School
Block 319
Pasir Ris street 10
Singapore 510314



Report of an accident which took place in school

On Tuesday, 22 August 2006, John, Tommy, Jason and I were playing a game at school. At approximately 12 noon, I witnessed an accident taking place among the three students. I am writing this report to give you a clearer picture of what happened then.

The students were granted permission to venture around the canteen area once they had finished the work that was assigned to them. We were amongst the first to complete their work and decided to enjoy ourselves after a long, stressful period so we went to the fitness corner to play. Jason decided to challenge us to a game at the monkey bar. Whoever reached the end first will be the winner.

We readily agreed. We were so excited that we started the race the very next moment. John, who was too eager to win the race skipped over a bar. At this point, he lost his grip and fell off to the ground. He seemed to have broken his arm. He cringed his face.

The three of us were appalled and immediately lifted him up. Fortunately, one of the teachers, Mr Tan, came to help and I went to take the first aid set immediately. While Mr Tan was bandaging his arm, he realized that John’s arm was seriously injured so he took John to the nearby clinic for a check up. Luckily, it was not so serious after all. According to the doctor, John had to stay at home for about one to two months in order to have a speedy recovery.

We have realized our mistakes and promise not to play at the fitness corner again.

I hope that my statement would help you have a better understanding of the accident.



Joey Ngien

Teacher’s comments: Good effort, Joey! However, you have missed out on some points such as point 3 (the damage done). You may also want to describe point 4 in greater detail. Note your tenses.

Sample 2: Jenies Lim (22/30)

Jenies Lim
Blk 123
Pasir Ris street 35
#06-789
Singapore 510123

Mr Chin Kim Beng
Principal of Chungfu Secondary School
123 Paya Lebar Road
Singapore 088027


Report of an accident during a game played at school

On Monday, 21 August 2006, my friends and I were playing a game at school. At approximately three in the afternoon, my friends and I witnessed an incident of how one of our friends, Tom was badly injured. I am writing this report to give you a clearer picture of what happened then.

We were granted permission to play in the school premises. Three of my friends, John, Wayne and Tom decided to do some dangerous stunts. Unfortunately, during Tom’s turn, he was badly injured when he attempted to do a mid-air somersault.

His school uniform was soiled and one side of the sleeves was torn by the sharp point of the roses’ branches which were planted near where they were playing.

I felt sorry for him as I could feel how painful it must have been although I was not the victim. My other friends also realized that what they had done was wrong. They should not have performed dangerous stunts without thinking about the consequences. We helped Tom up and brought him to a bench to rest. Paul then brought some medicine.

In fact, all of us are to be blamed as Tom would not have gotten into this trouble if I had told them not to play there. The three boys should also have known that anything can happen if these stunts were done. Tom has accepted our aplogies.

I hope that my statement will help you have a better understanding of the incident.


Jenies

Teacher’s comments: Good effort, Jenies! This piece of report can be improved by (1) reporting in greater detail as well as with greater clarity how the whole accident happened
(2) talk about how both you and others felt

Informal letter writing (Sec 1/5)

You have just received a letter from your pen pal in London, Shirley. She mentioned that she is keen to pursue her secondary education overseas. In her letter, she mentioned the following:

• She aspires to take on a career in the area of Information Technology.

• She has keen interest in the arts, especially music.

• She dreads the rainy season in London as it always looks so grey.

• She has a great love for outdoor activities. She enjoys the sun and the sea and would love to spend her weekends by the beach playing volleyball.

• She enjoys tasting a variety of food.

Write a letter to her persuading her to come to Singapore to study in your school.

Your letter must cover the requirements of the five aspects in detail.

Set your letter out correctly, in clear, accurate English and in a friendly tone to inform Shirley more about Singapore and your school.

Sample 1: by Zhi Ru

Chin Zhi Ru
Blk 8 Tanah Suma
#06-1234
Singapore 118805

27th August 2006

Dearest Shirley,
Hello. How are you? Well, I am fine. You wrote in your letter that you want to pursue your secondary education overseas. Why don’t you come to Singapore to pursue your secondary education? It would be a whole lot of fun studying here. It is a small city but it is really nice.

Are you sure that you want to study Information Technology and make it your future career? You can take up this subject in the secondary school. You can also join the school’s band or Chinese Orchestra and learn about different kinds of musical instruments and take part in the Singapore’s Youth Festival Competition to compete with other schools.

Dread London’s rainy season? Singapore has a tropical climate so you can see the sun shining above you everyday! If you like, we can play volley ball together at the beach in the sun every weekend. Here, you can play all you want!

Singapore is a multi-racial country. There are different races in Singapore like the Chinese, Malays, Indians, Eurasians and so on. We are really lucky to be a multi-racial country as we get to taste different types of food and celebrate different kinds of festivals. There is a wide variety of food here like the Malays’ mee rebus and longtong, the Indians’ roti prata and many more. So don’t you worry that you will be eating the same kind of food everyday!

I hope that you will really consider pursuing your studies in Singapore. I have to go now. Bye!

Yours Sincerely,
Zhi Ru

Teacher’s comments: Well-written piece of work, Zhi Ru! Your points have been nicely elaborated though you can develop them in even greater detail to score even higher. Language wise, this is a very coherent piece of work. Good, keep it up!

Sample 2: by Eunice Choy

Eunice Choy
Block 782 Pasir Ris st 71
#03-582
Singapore 510782

24th August 2006

Hello Shirley,

How have you been? I received your letter two days ago and learned that you are keen to pursue your secondary education overseas. I am glad to hear that. Would you like to come to Singapore? You can study in my school. I will also be glad to see you for the first time and we can spend a great deal of time with each other. Oh! What fun we will have together!

I know that you aspire to take up a job in the area of Information Technology. Information Technology is a good area to learn all about new technology like computers, radios, televisions and many more. It is a good choice of career for you, especially since you are a girl. You know, whenever you have a problem with a computer, for instance, you will know what to do with it. In Singapore schools, we even have computer lessons and Design and Technology lessons. Computer lessons teach us how to use the computer and it different functions. Design and Technology classes teach us how to make practical items like the pencil holder, a wooden block with a hook and so on. We use various kinds of tools and learn about their functions too. It is so exciting and interesting! Would you like to join in the fun too?

I also understand that you are very passionate about music. That is good because in my school, we have music lessons twice a week. I have an interest in music too. I will always be so fidgety during the lessons before music as I cannot wait for the lesson to come and know what we will be learning that day. My music teacher is Mr Peter Lee. He is a really friendly teacher. You will like him the moment you see him. A bright twinkle is always in his eyes and his mouth is always curved upwards into a broad smile. His lessons are very fun and enjoyable too. Just last week, I learned that there are many instruments in the Orchestra family. This Orchestra family is split into a few groups. They are the String, Woodwind, Brass and Percussion instruments. I also learned the different sounds that different instruments make. It was so fun that when the bell rang for the end of lesson, I was utterly disappointed!

It is good that you enjoy the sun and the sea. It is healthy to spend your weekends by the beach playing volleyball. Exercising and playing games strengthen the body and build up our muscles. As the saying goes, “Eat well, study well and rest well.” We must eat, rest and study adequately. That is to say, we must eat enough nutritious food, study hard and have enough sleep and rest too. This is the only way to stay fit and trim!

I heard from you that the rainy season in London always looks so grey and you do not like it. If you come to Singapore, you do not need to worry anymore, because most of the time, we have fine weather. Even though it can be quite humid at times, it still allows you to go out for outdoor activities. We also have beautiful beaches have in Singapore. You can come to Singapore and we can have a picnic on the beach and then play a game of volleyball. How about that?

After that, I can bring you to a huge seafood restaurant to have a sumptuous meal. You will get a chance to taste a variety of seafood here and I bet you will enjoy tasting them. There is prawn, crab, eel, fish, crayfish and other delicacies that you can feast on.

I got to go now. I am looking forward to your reply and hope that I have been successful in persuading you to come to Singapore.

Love,
Eunice

Teacher’s comments: Eunice, this is a very mature piece of writing. Each point has been very well elaborated. I enjoy reading your writings. Keep up your excellent work!

Sample 3: Jonathan Wong

Jonathan Wong
Blk 878 Tampines Ave 8
#08-320
Singapore 520878

24th August 2006

Dear Shirley,

How are you? I have just received your letter and I know that you want to go overseas to study. Have you ever considered coming to Singapore to study? Singapore is the perfect place for you as it has all the things you want.

When you come to Singapore, you can study in my school, Coral Secondary School. In Coral, you can study Information Technology. In Coral, there are teachers that are very well-trained in Information Technology and you can approach them when you have any questions. The teachers here are very nice and you do not have to be shy.

In Coral, there are a few CCAs that involve arts and music such as the drama club, the choir, the military band and the Chinese orchestra. These CCAs usually take part in various competitions and they always achieve good results. They will also perform on some special occasions.

I figured from your letter that the rainy season in London is very dreadful. However, in Singapore, most of the time, the weather is fine and it is very sunny. Sometimes, when it is too hot, there will be some rainfall that will cool down the temperature.

During the weekends, we can go to the beach together. The beach in Pasir Ris Park is very close to my home. Many people go there to spend their weekends. We can play beach volleyball or we can go for a dip in the sea. We can also go to various tourist attractions besides going to the beach too.

In Singapore, you do not have to worry about food. There will be food available in all parts of Singapore. The stalls provide a wide range of delicacies. You can also have a taste of the famous satay or laska or the local cuisines.

I sincerely hope that you can come to Singapore and study here, so we can have more time interacting with each other. I hope to hear from you soon.

Regards,
Jonathan Wong

Teacher’s comments: A very good piece of work, Jonathan! All the points have been well-developed and your writing is clear and coherent! Keep up with your excellent work!

Sample 4: Shadirah Bte Zaharum

Jessica Amber
Blk 251
Tampines street 10
#07-104
Singapore 560251

20th August 2006

Dearest Shirley,

How are you? It has been a long time since I last heard from you. By the way, my parents send their regards to you. They really miss you a lot. Food to hear that you are keen to pursue your secondary education abroad. How about coming to Singapore? The secondary schools in Singapore are great! I cannot wait to show you around.

Hey, I know how much you want a career of Information Technology so guess what? There are such courses available in my school which will prove very useful for the career you are currently pursuing. At Coral Secondary School. Which is my school, we also specialize in the arts, especially in music. The school has won many awards for music, all thanks to the school band. As I write, I can almost see a smile spreading across your face! You can join my school’s band as your co-curricula activity because I know that you are keen in music. Surely, you will have a whale of time in my school.

Oh dear! Is the weather in London that gloomy? Well, if you hate the weather in London, you will surely admire and be dazzled by the environment, scenery and weather here in Singapore. Here, the weather is humid and rainy at times but the sun is always shining over this beautiful country. If it gets too hot, the rain will surely cool you off because the temperature here is quite moderate.

Besides the temperature, the variety of food also makes Singapore a unique country. The food shows that Singapore is a multi-racial country. There is the Malay, Chinese, Indian cuisines and more. My mum is also a good cook so if you want to taste the Malay type of food, you can come to my house. I can also bring you around Singapore to have a taste of the different cuisines. You will definitely like the food here.

That is all for now. Do come to Singapore to experience a different culture and taste the different delicacies. I would love to spend the weekends with you at the beach, playing volleyball and just having fun together.

Your pen pal,
Jessica

Teacher’s comments: Very good effort, Shadirah! A clear and coherent piece of writing. Points have also been well-developed. I like how you engage your readers/pen-pal through the questions asked as well as descriptions of how you think the other party is responding. However, point 4 could have been developed in greater detail. Keep up your excellent work!

Sample 5: Zi Xiang

Zi Xiang
Blk 610
Pasir Ris Dive 1
#13-123
Singapore 510610

24th August 206

Dear Shirley,

How are you doing? I am doing great here. I heard that you would like to pursue your secondary education overseas. You also mentioned about those things which you like and dislike. You are so lucky as I have already found a place like this for you—that is my country! It has everything that you like but does not have the things you do not.

As you want to take on a career in the area of Information Technology, come to Singapore! Here in Singapore, technology is very advanced, making it very easy to find an IT course.

As for music, it is everywhere in Singapore. It is quite common to see music classes being offered in places like the shopping centres. You can also learn to play all kinds of instruments and music.

I know that you love feasting on a wide range of food. You know what? This is the best place to be in as Singapore is what people call the “Food Paradise”. There are Thai, Chinese, Japanese, Western and many more types of cuisines available here.

The climate here is a warm one. It is quite constant. There is an absence of four seasons here. In fact, it is sunny all year round and the weather is always suitable for outdoor activities which you love most. The beaches are simply fantastic.

I think that is all for now. I hope that you would consider coming to Singapore to pursue you studies. Hope to receive your reply soon.

Thank you.

Yours sincerely,
Zi Xiang

Teacher's comments: Good piece of work, Zi Xiang! All the points have been nicely elaborated. take note however that though this is an informal letter, avoid using phrases/sentences that are too colloquial such as "You love different varieties of food right?" Otherwise, this is good effort. Keep it up!